Ep 3

(in the place where they judge immortal souls, it’s an ordinary day for King Yemma, judge of the dead. Strangly, a man In the line of dead people who needed to be judged named Goku has arrived, and kame, guardian of the earth, wishes for him to train with king kai, the greatest martial arts expert in the dead world)

King Yema: you want me to what?

Kame: simply let Goku train with king kai. The narrator said that already.

King Yema: and whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy would I let that stupid kai train him?

Kame: cause if you don’t, that line of dead people will increase by 6 BILLION!!!

 

 

King Yema: 6 BILLION! I can judge 6 billion faster than you can clean your dentures old man.

Kame: I am the guardian of the earth, could I please get some more respect?

King Yema: you kidding? Im the closest thing to a god in this show! Until you get to the kais. Then I’ll be HORRIBLY insignificant.

Kame: um

King Yema: See this desk! It’s made of MAHOGONY!

Kame: anyway

King Yema: Mahogony.

Kame: soooooooooooo

King Yema: whu? OH. Fine, he can train with king kai. But you’ll have to run on SNAAKE WAAAAAAAAY!

Kame: thanks!

Goku: before I go, have you seen my brother Raditz? He has funny armor and long spiky hair.

King Yema: you’ve described just about every major dragonball character. But yah, I saw a guy named Raditz.

Goku: did you judge him?

King Yema: UBER NO, he kicked me in the crotch and ran away. Now I don’t know where he is

Flashback of Raditz: he didn’t keep his eye on the birdie!

Goku: thanks! Bye!

King Yema: see ya next time you die!

…..

…..mahogony…..

(meanwhile)

Piccolo: (talking to Gohan) LISTEN UP RUNT! Today we’re gona commence your intense training under me! Then…I’ll use YOU for my conquest to take over the world!

Gohan: but wouldn’t that cause massive muscle degeneration for someone my age, crippling me for-

Piccolo: NERD!!!!!!!!!!

Gohan: what?

Piccolo: nothing. Since your powers seem to activate during extreme stress, I’m gona through you at that mountain over there.

Gohan: actually, that looks more like a platEAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!(thrown by Piccolo)

Piccolo: any second now. Come on!

SPLAT! (loud crying)

Piccolo: this is gona be a looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong training session

(meanwhile)

Bulma: I see you’ve gathered the Z warriors.

Krillin: who?

Bulma: that’s what we always call you guys! You know, you, Tien, Choustu, Goku, Piccolo and Yamcha.

Tien: yeah, we’d better get going to train.

Bulma: where are you going?

(Kame’s lookout)

Kame: MR. POPO!

Popo: yes Kame?

Kame: we have a new batch of trainees coming. Make sure you take GOOD care of them.

Popo: mwahahahahaa. Ahahaaaaaaaa. AHAHAHAHAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

(meanwhile)

Gohan: man, I cant believe that Piccolo left me on the top of this plateau all by myself.

Piccolo: (yells loudly) CLIMB DOWN!

Gohan: there’s no food or water up here.

Piccolo: I SAID! CLIMB DOOOWN!!!

Gohan: if I had some reeds or plants, I could make a makeshift ladder, or a rope…

Piccolo:GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Piccolo: now he’s just staring at the moon like a retarded puppy! I tried to make him stronger, but he’s nothing but a Weak DEFENSLESS LITTLE… is he getting bigger?

Gohan: (due to the moon, gohan transformed into a giant ape!) GRAAA!

Piccolo: okay, that’s new! Wait a second. His tail. His saiyen ancestry! Does this mean…EVERYONEOFGOHAN’SRACECANBECOMEAGIANTGORRILA!!!

(dramatic music!)

(giant monkey blasts away a mountain-er, plateau.)

Piccolo: if he destroys everything what’ll be left for me? (looks at moon)

Moon: …

Piccolo: QUIT MOCKING ME!!! (ZAPS MOON INTO MOONDUST)

Gohan changes back to normal.

Piccolo: ill get rid of this! (pulls off gohan’s tail)

Next day

Gohan: so Piccolo, what am I gona learn today? A brand new technique, how to sense energy, what about how to-

Piccolo: DODGE! (Punches Gohan 50 feet straight into a boulder)

Gohan: okay, this time I’ll-

Piccolo: DOOOOOODGE! (PWNS GOHAN!!!)

Gohan: okay, now I’m ready.

Piccolo:…………………….

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Gohan:………………………………………………………..um

Piccolo: DODGE! (blasts gohan with his pure awesomeness)